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SCFM Approved Minutes 10-14-2018

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Salem Creek Friends Meeting

Approved Minutes for 14 October 2018

Meeting for Worship with a Concern for Business


SCFM CALENDAR October–November 2018


21 October 2018        Meeting for worship and First Day School, 10:00 a.m.

                                    Sharing songs: a tune or so before the query discussion.

                                    Query:How am I encouraging the responsible use of natural resources and their

                                    nurture for future generations? How do I avoid wasteful consumption and seek

                                    to preserve the beauty and balance of God’s world?


28 October 2018        Meeting for worship and First Day School, 10:00 a.m. 

                                    Sandwich Sunday: CLEARNESS COMMITTEE SKILLS

                                    Bring finger food to share.

                                    --Baked goods to the Samaritan Ministries. Samaritan Wish                                                                        List available at             ...                                     --Non-perishable food items and toiletries for Second Harvest Food Bank

                                    --School supplies for the Forsyth Education Warehouse


4 November 2018     Meeting for worship and First Day School, 10:00 a.m. 

                                    Worship Sharing: Where do I find the balance between living in comfort and

                                    protection of the environment? Where do I struggle with the desire to protect the



9 November 2018     Monthly potluck, 6:30 p.m. at the home of John Cardarelli.


10 November 2018   PFYM Interim Meeting at New Garden Friends Meeting, Greensboro.


11 November 2018   Meeting for worship and First Day School, 10:00 a.m. 

                                    Meeting for worship with a concern for business.




19-21 April                PFF/YM RETREAT, Carolina Friends School, Durham, NC



PRESENT:  Dee Edelman, Linda Poller, Carla Hopkins, Kevin Hopkins, John Cardarelli, Sam Dempsey (Clerking for Dick Connell), Melrose Buchanan, Christina Connell (Recording for Lisa Gould)


1) The meeting began with a period of silent worship.


2) The minutes of 12 August and 2 September were read and approved.


3) Treasurer's Report: Sam reported that there is currently $3,818.30 in the checking account, $1,300 in the Memorial Fund, and $23,950 in the Meetinghouse Fund. The Meetinghouse Fund is on the cusp of $24,000, which has taken 9 years to accumulate. Meeting has made all budgeted contributions to wider Quaker organizations. He noted that we make our AFSC donation to the North Carolina AFSC office in Greensboro.

            Friends can be reimbursed for expenses on behalf of the meeting or make the expense a donation; let Sam know so he can give you credit for tax purposes. We budgeted $4,000 to the Meetinghouse Fund for 2018, and have been waiting to make the last $1,000 transfer (to be cautious). Since the funds are available, Friends approved that the treasurer move $1,000 to the Meetinghouse Fund.

            We have had a request from Quaker House for a contribution for a video on the history of Quaker House for their 50th anniversary; Friends agreed to donate an additional $100 to Quaker House for the video, with the idea that in 2019 we may contribute an additional $100 for the celebration of the 50th anniversary.


4) Correspondence:  The fall FCNL newsletter concentrates on preventing violence and building peace, especially in relation to genocide around the world. We also received acknowledgement from Samaritan Ministries; they are feeding 350–400 people every day. Quaker Earthcare Witness acknowledged our contribution and sent a flyer for their First Day School curriculum. [NOTE: Also available (115 pages) online at] Sam also shared The Nation, one of oldest political publications in the country, which he and Dee are passing along to anyone who would like to read it.


5) Nominating Committee: Christina reported that the committee has met and also communicated by phone. Another meeting is scheduled in October. Discussion included consideration of the number of committees at SCFM. Nominating Committee wants to coordinate with Ministry and Counsel on the possibility of combining, eliminating, and/or renaming committees. We have 12–13 active members/attenders and 6–7 committees. Numerically this makes committee assignments and work problematical. Discussion included the idea that combining has the advantage of a simpler approach and allows newer members and attenders to participate when there are other more experienced members on the committee. It would seem there's an overlap of responsibilities of some committees. Some individuals are more effective when groups (whether designated as a committee or not) take on a task that can be accomplished in a finite amount of time. One idea would be to have subcommittees with designated tasks, though this begins to approach the structure we have now. Another consideration is that some of the work undertaken is seasonal, such as Peace & Social Concerns’ work to support family needs during the Christmas season. So there may be a way to combine by season. It is important not to put too much on one committee. Everyone on two committees is less functional than having smaller number of committees. There is a concern about how much to ask one group of 3–4 people to do. Another question is the length of service of the Meeting Clerk: is three years too long? A similar question can be asked about service as Treasurer and Recording Clerk. Discussion will continue in Nominating Committee, in Ministry and Counsel, and in the Meeting as a whole.


6) Ministry & Counsel: Dee reported that Ministry & Counsel met and discussed some issues raised by Nominating (see above). The committee is also considering use of the queries. They have been distributed and opportunity given for review. A comment applauded their impressive simplicity and thoroughness. Friends approved their use through 2019. It was also suggested that these queries be shared with PFYM. Prompts for worship sharing were previously approved.


7) Religious Education:  No report. John commented that Judy Conrad has been organizing the First Day School room. The First Day School sign-up sheet needs signers. There is also now a clipboard so anyone borrowing a book can record that they have it.

8) Community Care: Linda reported that the committee met but that there is no news. Appreciation was expressed for refreshments during business meeting.


9) Peace & Social Concerns: John reported that the committee has not met. He will connect with El Buen Pastor to continue our traditional help with holidays. Last year we provided mainly gift cards, which were most welcome.


10) Building & Grounds: Sam reported on a lease proposed by Winston-Salem Friends Meeting. We have been asked to pay $150 per month (a $25 per month increase) and to obtain a general liability insurance policy. Sam stated that our budget will allow the increased monthly amount. There also needs to be clarification of the times during which we will use the space. There is a 90-day cancellation option by either party. We are exploring the cost of the liability policy; it was noted that having a liability policy is a good idea even if not required by the lease.


11) PFF/PFYM: Nothing new from PFYM. PFF will be meeting at Friendship Meeting in two weeks to organize the spring retreat at Carolina Friends School. The retreat will focus on Quaker House.


12) Interfaith Winston-Salem & NC Council of Churches: Dee described the Interfaith Council's annual tour of three faith communities each spring, usually in April. The idea was presented at an earlier meeting for business that Quakers could be on that tour. In 2018, the Bahai church, which meets in people's homes, did a presentation at the library. We could use a similar space to do a presentation. At each location, speakers describe the fundamental tenets of their faith, the fundamental practices, and how they are linked to the wider world. Each talk is approximately 25 minutes. Afterwards, those who wish gather at the last location for pizza and discussion, and are also asked to fill out an evaluation of the event. The goal is to foster understanding of other faiths. Mosques are often included. The event is typically attended by 200–300 people who are interested in learning about the various religions. Friends had a positive response to the idea of participating in the tour and approved exploring how to participate. Sam and Christina expressed willingness to be speakers.


13) Quaker House: Plans for the 50th anniversary celebration in 2019 are being finalized.


14) Old Business: Old business included topics already covered: the donation for the Quaker House video, the lease, Quakers as interfaith tour site in 2019, and use of queries.


15) New Business: Thanks to Dee and Sam for hosting last Friday's potluck. Fortunately they had not lost power from Hurricane Michael. Dee offered thanks to Friends for doing postcards to potential voters before dinner.

            It was decided to try adding a singing component to the Query discussion Sunday on 21 October, with the notion that if this seems successful it could become a more permanent feature. If you have a copy of Rise Up Singing, it would be helpful to bring it.


16) The October–November calendar was reviewed.


17) The meeting closed with a period of silent worship.

Salem Creek Friends Meeting

Query Discussion 19 August 2018


In attendance: Melrose Buchanan, Marty Carroll, Judy Conrad, Dick Connell, and Lisa Gould.


Query:How do I live in the power of that Life and Spirit that takes away the occasion of all wars? How do I approach conflict inside and outside Meeting by recognizing that of God in the other? How do I use my words to increase fuller understanding?


Friends spoke of some of the choices they’ve made and struggles they’ve had in trying to live this query. We are challenged to be open and listen to others, to avoid being judgmental, and to pay attention to our words and body language when we interact with others.


Years ago one Friend made the choice to live below a taxable income, but she is very aware that many people cannot make this life choice. She sees the great disparity between the amount of poverty in our country and what the country spends on war-related activities.


Another Friend spoke of struggling with anger in the wake of property theft; he recognized that those feelings took a lot of emotional energy, and now feels calmer and has less animosity toward the culprits.


Aretha Franklin’s death struck a chord with some: her life was not easy, but her music touched so many. Music can bring us together; just the act of singing together creates unity. Seeking ways to unify diverse people is an important goal, whether through music or other means.


Friends Committee on National Legislation urges us to see “that of God” in others, and has useful suggestions for interacting with our legislators, including using gentle phrases and trying to come from a “decompressed place”. Friends were reminded of the early Quakers in America, who, when dealing with Native Americans and other non-Friends, would ask if they could all go into silence together.


Salem Creek Friends Meeting

Query Discussion 23 September 2018


In attendance: Bill Boyd, Zora Boyd, Melrose Buchanan, John Cardarelli, Marty Carroll, Christina Connell, Dick Connell, Judy Conrad, Sam Dempsey, and Lisa Gould.


Query: How do I ground myself in the understandings of my faith? Am I clear about my beliefs? How do I share my faith and beliefs with others, inside and outside of the Meeting community?


Salem Creek Friends resonate with the core belief that there is “that of God” in everyone and everything, and that we seek to speak to the divine in all: we are all containers for the Light. We know this through our life experiences in both good and dark times, but often we struggle to explain this core belief to people outside of Friends.


Friends are lifelong seekers, and we have been inspired by faith traditions both within and without the Society of Friends. Many of us have left faiths that had more codified beliefs, and many have had periods of both belief and disbelief.


With so many needs in the world, putting our faith into action is a constant challenge. Faithful attendance at worship and business meeting grounds us and refreshes us, helping us meet that challenge, whether it is in visible (and sometimes lonely) ways, or in less public service. We are guided by the presence of divine love that permeates all.